Who Wears the Pants in This Economy?
Patsy Prater’s office looks like something between an executive’s and a teacher’s, her large desk crowded with neat piles of grant applications and daily logs but also with dishes of candy and other freebies for the young and old who pass through. On the bulletin board behind her head are big, colorful signs designed to remind her public-housing clients of what they are eligible for: cellphones, computer classes or prescriptions that she makes sure they have even if she has to drive them to the pharmacy herself. At the front of her desk is a photo of her “grandbaby,” who lives in Madison, Ala., three hours away. She wishes she could be there, taking care of the infant now that her daughter is back at work. “I love this job,” she said. “I know it’s where I’m supposed to be. But I am not a women’s-rights-type person. My place is in the home, and I’m fine with that, so long as my husband is earning the bacon. ‘Course, that hasn’t been happening so much lately.”
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A Uniform Story
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Ann Weathersby for The New York Times
Reuben and Patsy Prater
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Ann Weathersby for The New York Times
Rob and Connie Pridgen.
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Ann Weathersby for The New York Times
Connie Pridgen’s daughter, Abby Culberson
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Ann Weathersby for The New York Times
The First Baptist Church in Alexander City
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Patsy, who is 50 and works as a family-services director, and her husband, Reuben, 52, met on a blind date in 1979, and that very night he asked her to marry him — the first line of what he calls their “Cinderella” story. “What would you have done if I were a terrible kisser?” she likes to ask him, and he always answers, “I would have taught you how.” In 1981, Reuben was ready for a wedding, but Patsy was in her first year of college. Reuben told her he was madly in love, and if she did not quit school and marry him, he wouldn’t wait, “and I was stupid enough to believe him,” she says.
For the greater part of her marriage, the setup worked just fine for Patsy. Because Reuben stopped her from going to college, she could do what she wanted, which was to raise their three daughters without feeling guilty about not working. Reuben, who had a bachelor’s of science degree from Auburn University, was one of the longest-running service contractors for the Russell Corporation, the maker of athletic wear and the town’s largest employer. He ran a lucrative business cleaning the special pine floors at some of the mills and also had private clients in town. He made enough money for a very comfortable life: a house on a quiet, rural road here in Alexander City, Ala., four cars and multiple church missionary trips for his family to places like Africa and Brazil. Because he owned the business, Patsy could help him out with payroll and accounting on her own time and always be free to pick up the girls from school.